January Twenty

I cried today and it felt good.  I cried today because I was moved by the return of kindness, decency and civility.

I cried today because I was reminded that good can triumph.

I cried today because I was touched by the message of love and unity and inspired to be and do better.

I cried today because I could finally exhale. 

I had been holding my breath for over two weeks, possibly four years. I had cried on January 6th out of fear. I had a deep sense of sadness watching my fellow citizens behave badly. I cried watching elected officials plant seeds of divide and hate. I cried because anyone who has been bullied and on the receiving end of a narcissist will tell you that the feelings of helplessness and hopelessness are easily triggered by actions or events of a similar nature. The last four years have indeed been filled with trauma; personal, as well as, national and global.

I have experienced much loss and pain over the last four years. Our nation has experienced much pain and suffering as of late. Negative emotions can and do become internalized.

There was much anticipation that the year twenty-twenty would bring a renewed hope and promise of better tomorrows. It brought a collective PAUSE.

So, I’m choosing to transfer all my hopes and the promise of better tomorrows to twenty twenty-one. Much gratitude for the pause and the reset. I can finally exhale - with tears of relief.

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Reflections of Grace…

What cannot be said, will be wept.